heaven was jealous to merely look fair

by this time my heart and my head are aligned,its easy enough to say that its over and walk away like it never happened. to close the door on months. months spent waiting. im tired of waiting. im tired of being your rainy day.. i feel strange like ive lost something, but i couldnt tell you what, i like how close yet far apart we've become. i love your ideas. i wont wait for you.. but ill wait for him. does that make you jealous? or is it just that you like the idea of having me for all your rainy days? please explain the feelings you have these are mine: hes got this smile that gives me butterflies, almost in a bad way. you are the reason sleep rarely comes. i feel worn out and run down. i feel like i am in a cage. but its as if i put my self here to save me from me. its hard to think that this is all just me maybe protecting my heart from you. im rebuilding the walls, and i swear i wont let you get through this time.